3 Practices to Cultivate Feminine Leadership
by Tabby Biddle
For a long time now, women have been trying to come into leadership balance with men in business, politics, law, religion, you name it. And some of us have succeeded.
But many of us have done this from a place of calling upon our masculine attributes. While nothing is wrong with the masculine, we have to know that this is not the source of our power as women—and so we will burn out from exhaustion, eventually.
At the same time, many leadership books and programs out there today are still based on a patriarchal top-down leadership model, neglecting to honor and cultivate where a woman’s true power and leadership comes from—being a woman. I think this is a great disservice to not only women, but to the rest of our world.
Our world is coming apart at the seams with multiple wars happening, increased violence, political corruption, the climate crisis, increased rates of anxiety and depression, growing economic inequity, racial inequity, gender inequity, and human rights abuses the world over.
At the same time, there is plenty of research and data from numerous academic and corporate institutions, including Harvard University, the United Nations, and the American Psychological Association, pointing to the many benefits of women in leadership. Some of these include better financial outcomes, better decision-making, better communication, better teamwork, better team cultures, more honesty, greater employee engagement, greater job satisfaction, better mentorship, better work-life balance, more attunement to social issues, more creativity, more innovation, and better performance overall.
Need I say more?
This is one of the many reasons that, through my work, I am committed to amplifying women’s voices and growing the number of feminine leaders in our workplaces, communities and the world.
When I talk about feminine leadership, I am not just talking about women in leadership. Many women today are leading from a top-down patriarchal approach, focused on survival of the fittest and gaining compliance from employees, because this is what they were taught and what was modeled to them from the men before them. It’s also what they were told would “get them ahead.”
But feminine leadership isn’t about leading from a top-down approach, focused on competition, defeating the “enemy,” and gaining compliance (with makes people feel powerless). Feminine leadership comes from a woman connecting with and leading from her feminine center within her body, and leading from a place of reverence for feminine values and principles, some of which include dignity, respect, compassion, intuition, generosity, wisdom, creativity, and partnership.
When a woman is in her feminine leadership, she partners with masculine principles and values, such a strategy, focus, structure, stability, independence, strength, order, discipline and assertiveness—for wholeness and whole leadership.
While we used to think that we needed to emulate men to rise into leadership positions, and needed to deny our feminine nature in order to make it in a “man’s world,” today the story is different.
“As a feminine leader, you must remember that your inner life is valuable. ”
As you travel further on your journey into greater leadership and trailblazing change, it’s absolutely necessary for you to take time to rest, contemplate, and nourish yourself. This is essential to your feminine leadership. It is also necessary to connect with your feminine center, your physical body, and your authentic voice that lies within you. These are the keys to cultivating your feminine leadership.
If you are curious how to further cultivate your feminine leadership, so that you can feel good in your leadership and your life, please find below three of my favorite practices to support and cultivate feminine leadership.
3 Practices to Cultivate Your Feminine Leadership
Practice 1: Womb Breathing
Your womb is a storehouse of feminine wisdom. When you cultivate an awareness and relationship with your womb, you will more easily access your life’s purpose, your authentic voice, and the powerful feminine leader that you are meant to be.
Pick a place in your home where you feel at ease; where you can be still and quiet; and where you won’t get distracted by your to-do list. Sit comfortably, and place one hand on your heart, and the other hand on your womb (or low belly if you don’t have a womb). Take three long, slow deep breaths, inhaling and exhaling through your nose. Feel your belly rise and fall with each breath. Focus your attention on your womb. As you breathe, try not to judge anything. Simply breathe and notice the energy around your womb. When you finish your three breaths, give thanks for being a woman and honor yourself for simply showing up with loving kindness to be present with your body and your breath.
PRACTICE 2: Pelvis Power
As women, our pelvis and hips are great storehouses of our feminine power. This the place from which we give birth (both literally and figuratively). In order to access this power, we need to remove blockages and stagnancy and awaken the hips and pelvis by creating a safe and fun relationship with them.
Find a comfortable space in your home where you can move freely and undisturbed. Set your timer for 3 minutes for this practice. Stand with your feet slightly wider than the width of your hips and bend your knees slightly. Place your hands on your hips and gently start moving your hips in a circle in one direction. How do they feel? How do you feel? Simply notice without judging. After about 1 minute, change the direction of your circle. This direction might feel different for you. Be curious about it. After 1 minute, let your hips move in whatever direction they want and whatever way they want (i.e. big circles, small circles, spirals), and allow your arms and hands to express however they want. If your hips don’t take the lead, you can take the lead and then slowly ask your hips to guide you. Just focus on being in your body. Luxuriate in your hips and pelvis until you hear your timer sound. Then gradually come into stillness. Close your eyes and feel your breath move through your body. Enjoy the stillness and feel what’s alive in your body.
Practice 3: SOUNDING
Sounding is a practice that helps us connect our inner, intuitive voice with our outer, worldly voice. When practiced on a regular basis, it can help you become more confident in using your voice publicly in a way that is connected to your soul. Some might call this your authentic voice.
Sit comfortably in a spot in your home where you feel at ease and where you won’t be disturbed. Allow your eyes to soften. Take three long deep breaths in and out through your nose to help your body settle. After your next big inhale, allow the sound of “Hum” to release out of your mouth as you exhale. Repeat this 2 more times. On your next round of breaths, instead of “Hum”, allow the the sound “Maaaa” to come out of your mouth. MA is a seed syllable that honors the Divine Feminine and feminine principle of life and nature. As you make this sound, feel the sound vibrate throughout the cells of your body. Allow this moment to be a deep honoring of your femininity and the feminine aspect of life. Finish your sounding practice by allowing the sound “Aum” to release from your mouth on your exhale. OM is a seed syllable that represents the connection between all things and all beings. Repeat this 2 times, and then gently bow your head to your heart and honor yourself for doing this important practice to connect and align your inner voice with your outer, leadership voice.
Instead of an upward climb into leadership and influence, you have an opportunity today to create a distinctly new model, one that is based on power with, rather than power over, and one that is based on your power within. Our leadership as women, once dependent on getting approval or permission from a patriarchal gatekeeper, no longer is about this.
We are living in a time where we women need to show up in our leadership—both for ourselves and the world. I define leadership as something that is innate in every woman, and not necessarily something that needs to be learned, as much as it needs to be remembered.
Tabby Biddle, M.S. Ed. is a women’s leadership coach and award-winning writer dedicated to uplifting and championing women’s voices in the world. She specializes in helping women find their voice and amplify it as writers, public speakers and thought leaders—not tethered to the old ways of patriarchy, but in a new paradigm of feminine leadership. Curious about working with Tabby? Learn more.