Are You Terrified of Public Speaking? (I was!)
by Tabby Biddle
For years, I was terrified of public speaking. I was scared I’d say something wrong. Scared I might freeze on stage. Scared that I wouldn’t make sense. Scared that my audience might think I’m a bit loopy. Scared that I might offend someone. And even scared for my life.
These fears kept me off of the stage, and also kept me from sharing my message to champion and elevate women’s voices. I was hiding in fear. The irony did not escape me.
After some time, I realized my message was too important to keep quiet. If I could make a positive difference in one woman’s life through public speaking, then that could have a ripple effect—in her family, in her workplace, in her community, in her country, and maybe even around the world.
I also realized that if I didn’t step onto the stage, I would be contributing to the underrepresentation of women on public speaking stages, and leadership overall. And this, I knew, was a big problem.
So, despite the fears, I decided to step on stage anyway.
Since those realizations, I’ve spoken on many stages, big and small, from Hollywood, to corporate America, to the United Nations, to the TEDx stage.
My audiences have included business leaders, political leaders, media & entertainment leaders, social activists, entrepreneurs, screenwriters, novelists, women in tech, teenage girls from under-served communities, and more.
And instead of panicking before every speaking event, I actually started having fun!
If you struggle with fears around public speaking, but know that you have an important message to deliver that could benefit from a public speaking stage, I want to offer you today three tools that I used (and still use) to get me up on those stages.
3 Tools To Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking
TOOL 1: Dedicate your talk to one person.
In advance of giving your talk—in the writing process—call to mind one person who will benefit from your talk. Then, write the talk for them. Envision how they will feel as a result of hearing to your talk. Less alone? Less scared? Encouraged? Emboldened? Ready to take on the world? Dedicate your talk to them. This will help take away some of your nerves, and motivate you to get up there on stage for their benefit.
TOOL 2: Think of yourself as a conduit (rather than a “speaker”).
This can help you get out of your own way and open up more space within you to breathe, which will help you feel more grounded, confident and calm. This talk is not about you, it’s about the idea or message you are delivering. Your job is to be there in service of that idea, and offer it as a gift. ❤️
TOOL 3: Tune into the ripple effect of your talk.
What is the social mission (or larger purpose) behind your talk? Tune into this mission and purpose. What could the world look like if 1 person adopted your idea? 10 people? 100 people? 1000 people? And so forth. How might this change our world for the better? Let this be the fuel that drives you to get up there on that stage. The world is waiting for you!
Over the last decade, I’ve worked with hundreds of women to help them their find their voice and prepare to speak on stages big and small — from industry conferences, to political debates, to TEDx events, to South by Southwest, to the United Nations, to their local Chamber of Commerce.
If you have fears around public speaking, yet you know you need to be speaking from larger and more influential stages, I invite you to join me and a community of inspired women leaders and emerging leaders for the next round of Women On Stage.
Since overcoming my own fears around public speaking, I have helped hundreds of women hone their message, craft their talk, and prepare to have their voices heard around the world.
If you want to speak on the TEDx stage, and do more public speaking in 2023 and beyond, it would be my honor to support you, too.
I look forward to supporting you toward your dreams in 2023! Together, we rise.
Women On Stage is an online course & group coaching program designed for women aspiring to speak on the TEDx stage. The application deadline is Friday, February 24th. Don’t let fear hold you back! Learn more & apply here.
Tabby Biddle, M.S. Ed., is the bestselling author of Find Your Voice: A Woman’s Call to Action, a TEDx speaker, a private coach to TEDx speakers globally, the speaker coach for TEDxDelthorneWomen in Los Angeles, and the creator of Women On Stage, a 10-week online course & group coaching program for women aspiring to speak on the TEDx stage. Learn more here.